Game 3: Wha' happened?

It's Beard-a-tron's birthday, and it's safe to say that the Chicago refs will not be getting humorous thank-you e-cards. In fact, they might be getting humorous get-bent e-cards. You think a reverse headlock on LeBron might be a foul? Maybe a blatant dive trying to flee from the Bearded King's wrath could be a block instead of a charge? Regardless of the infinitely shoddy officiating, the Cavs nearly erased a twenty-point deficit, scaring the bejeezus out of Bulls fans until the moment Beardless Anthony Parker's prayer was denied by the Beard Gods. The Bulls hit jumpers left and right and upside down, got cheap fouls on Shaqbeard the Pirate, benefited from innumerable turnovers, and still only won by two.

Listen, bearded brethren: the Cavs aren't going to lose this series. It's just not going to happen. Maybe we should be glad they're not coasting through the first round like they did last year; in spite of the Bearded King's majestic splendor, they still need a few games to gel as a fully assembled puzzle. There is indeed a silver lining to this loss: it gives our Playoffs Beards more time to fill out. Lord knows we need it.

Game 3 Beard Reactions

Beard-a-tron: All I wanted for my birthday was a Cavs win... and a solid gold Escalade. I didn't even get the Escalade.







Beardzilla: I feel sick. For the first time in franchise history, we finally have a guy who should get superstar calls, and he DOESN'T GET SUPERSTAR CALLS! Seriously, what do you have to do to this guy to get a foul called, cut him with a prison shiv? Prediction for Game 4: pain.